My Spoonie Sisters
Welcome to My Spoonie Sisters! If you're wondering what a "Spoonie" is, it’s a term lovingly embraced by those living with chronic illnesses, based on the Spoon Theory. It’s all about managing our limited energy (or “spoons”) while navigating life’s challenges.
Each week, join us to hear from your "Spoonie Sisters" host, co-hosts, and our inspiring special guests as we share real-life stories, tips, and encouragement. Whether you're here to learn, connect, or feel less alone, you’ll find a supportive space filled with understanding, laughter, and strength. Let’s journey through chronic illness together!
Tune in and join the sisterhood!
All guests featured or mentioned in this podcast will be listed for your convenience. Don't forget to rate and subscribe to My Spoonie Sisters and follow @MySpoonieSisters on Instagram for updates on new episodes and more. If you have a story to share or want to be featured on My Spoonie Sisters, please email MySpoonieSisters@gmail.com. We eagerly look forward to speaking and hearing from all our Spoonies!
Disclaimer: While we are not doctors or healthcare Practitioners, we want to assure you that this podcast is a credible source of information. It's based on our guests' personal experiences and the strategies we've found effective for ourselves. However, everyone's body is unique, and what works for one person may not work for another. If you have any health-related questions, it's always best to consult your Primary Doctor or Rheumatologist.
Remember, our goal at My Spoonie Sisters is to connect people and provide them with the support and tools they need to live better lives.
My Spoonie Sisters
The Audacious Patient: Finding Your Voice in a Broken Healthcare System
Have you ever wondered what it's like to be both the healer and the one in need of healing? Meet Mallory Carlson, an acupuncturist of nearly 12 years who has simultaneously navigated her own 16-year journey with debilitating migraines and women's health issues.
Mallory takes us deep into the raw reality of chronic pain, sharing how she's learned to read her body's signals and transform what once required days of recovery into hours. Her story illuminates the profound mental health challenges that come with chronic illness—from the isolation of canceled plans to the guilt of feeling like you're "too much"—and the powerful practice of self-compassion she's developed in response.
The conversation turns particularly powerful when Mallory describes her experiences with medical gaslighting and the physical, almost shock-like reaction she had when finally finding a doctor who recognized her condition after 14 years of searching. "It was such a physical experience," she explains, "the act of being seen and finding someone who can take care of you."
From this frustration emerged her platform, The Audacious Patient, born from righteous rage at healthcare inequities and dedicated to making complex medical information accessible. As Mallory shifts from hands-on patient care to education and advocacy, she's channeling her personal struggles into a mission that helps others avoid the years of confusion she endured.
Whether you're managing chronic illness, supporting someone who is, or simply interested in healthcare advocacy, this episode offers practical wisdom, validation, and a reminder that sometimes our greatest challenges become our greatest gifts to others. As Mallory beautifully summarizes what it means to be part of a chronic illness community: "It's solidarity and just a quiet knowing... we just have to be there for each other."
Are you living with a chronic illness and want to make your voice heard? Rare Patient Voice connects patients and caregivers with research opportunities—so you can share your experiences and get paid for your time! Your insights help drive real change in healthcare.
Let's Get Started - Rare Patient Voice
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Welcome back to my Spoonie Sisters, where we spotlight the raw realities, strength and soul of chronic illness warriors across the globe. Today's guest is the definition of audacious a healer, a fighter and an educator with a heart that refuses to quit. Meet Mallory Carlson, an acupuncturist of nearly 12 years and a chronic pain patient for over 16. She's been navigating debilitating migraines and women's health concerns with incredible resilience, all while holding space for others to heal. Lately, her purpose has begun to shift. She's feeling called to move away from hands-on care and lean into educating and empowering others through her platform.
Speaker 2:The Audacious Patient, mallory is also a fantasy-loving bookworm, a theme party enthusiast, a lover of nature walks and beach days, bonfires and game nights with friends and, of course, she's a cat mom to Hazel, her 15-year-old snuggle queen. Mallory brings honesty, depth and a refreshing dose of humor to her advocacy, and we're so excited to have her on the show. We also have our co-hosts, andy Byers and Linnea Knisley. Welcome, welcome, mallory. Thank you for being here. Can you tell us a little bit about your journey into acupuncture and what initially drew you to this healing path?
Speaker 3:Absolutely, and thank you for having me. Well, I have always been really drawn to holistic healing, healing in general, particularly that kind of blends, kind of left brain and right brain thinking, kind of a more factual pragmatic with a more creative spiritual kind of thinking. So acupuncture felt like a really good fit. I actually dove into acupuncture school before I ever even had acupuncture before. I just kind of made it an intuitive decision that it was the avenue for me. So it was kind of happenstance, but it ended up being a really good match for me.
Speaker 2:What's it been like balancing your role as a healer while also being someone who lives with chronic pain yourself?
Speaker 3:A real challenge, honestly, some days better than others, of course, as is the roller coaster of chronic pain, but for the most part I've found it to be helpful in my role as a healer because I am able to relate and understand people's experience of pain in a much deeper way than if I just was an outsider who just had the healer's hands and didn't experience it myself. But certainly the days where I have to go in with a migraine are tough. I'm lucky enough to have a boss who also struggles with migraines, so there is a lot of compassion in my workplace when that does happen. But it doesn't make it any less hard because I just try to push through if I can and at the same time it can actually be helpful to just be able to go into the clinic and be focused on other people's other people period rather than my own pain and my own issues. So it's a mixed bag, but mostly I find it to be helpful.
Speaker 1:I can see how having a chronic illness and what you do would be actually probably very helpful for the patient and you, because you both can see you're not alone in this. My own primary is a doctor who has a chronic illness. I love having a doctor. You've been living with migraines for 16 years. How have they evolved over time and impacted your day-to-day life?
Speaker 3:It's really had quite an up-and-down evolution. So it started out kind of slow and it started out when I was in acupuncture school, I think, just being a student on silver books and computers and sitting in a classroom for eight hours a day, whatever, I think it went on slowly in a classroom, for you know, eight hours a day, whatever I think brought it on slowly. I do think it is definitely musculoskeletal rooted. Because of that it progressively got worse over the course of a few years where I, you know, started getting them three or four times a week and that's you know where I'm totally throwing up and just cannot function Until I found I did find a doctor who she kind of was like I don't really know what to do for migraines.
Speaker 3:I was like, well, it's very musculoskeletal rooted. She's like, well, let's try some muscle relaxers. And so I did and it did. It did really help. I took muscle relaxers pretty religiously for about six months, which is longer than I would like to have, but got to a point where I stopped taking them. And now, ever since that was probably seven, eight years ago ever since I've come down to migraines maybe once a month. So big, big, big difference, but they are still just as debilitating when they come on, and even if I don't go into like a full migraine much more than once a month, I still more frequently can feel like I'm edging toward a flare up. I need to self-care, so I don't go down that path much more frequently than that.
Speaker 2:You mentioned a migraine hangover that can last into the next day. Can you describe what that feels like and how you navigate?
Speaker 3:it? Yeah, absolutely. When I get migraines, I'm typically waking up with them and I've kind of been able to expedite my migraine experience just because I know how they are. So if I wake up with a little bit of neck pain, just a little bit of a kink in the neck, I know I have to get out of bed right now or I'm going to be throwing up in three hours. However, most of the time I do start moving around and I, you know, I get my pain patch on, I get my heat on, I take some ibuprofen, I do whatever stretch and usually I end up having to throw up before then it passes or I'm able to kind of lay down again and it can pass. So then the rest of the day, typically after that, once the worst of it is over, the hangover is very like I'm still achy, I still have the muscle aches, but you know, not as bad and I'm very hazy, foggy, can't concentrate, I'm starving. It's really not just similar from an alcohol hangover, I will say.
Speaker 2:It's absolutely terrible it is. I've experienced it myself and I think a lot of people have. And yeah, I think you do a great job of putting into words what it feels like For me. I think I'm always telling people like give me no sound, no light, no movement. Just let me be in a really dark room and go away.
Speaker 3:Yep, yep. I have found, actually, though, that for me, I need that for that period of time where I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm sick, and then I just was sick. Now I need to relax and let it pass, but once I'm over the worst of it, I actually have to get up and move. I have to get out and move, otherwise it won't pass. Like motion is lotion right, like even just a gentle walk, even just you know whatever, like putting dishes in the dishwasher, just be sick, just moving around the house can be helpful, but it is all about timing, because if I try to push it, it's not going to be good. If I don't try to get myself out of it at a certain point, it's also not good.
Speaker 2:So it's learning how to read your body which is not easy Absolutely, and I think those that suffer with migraines they get to know their body better through time and they know what works for them and what doesn't. My husband had his first migraine last year and as he kept describing how he was feeling, I'm like, oh my gosh, you're having a migraine, like here's an ice pack, go lay down, stop trying to do all the things you're trying to do. And I went to check on him 10 minutes later and he was passed out on the bed, ice pack on his neck and everything, and it worked. But some people, if they've never experienced that, they have no idea.
Speaker 3:You don't know how to yeah what's going on or how to manage it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I've taken all the ibuprofen and I've done all the things. Why is the headache not going away? Well, because it's not a headache.
Speaker 3:Yep, yep, more yeah.
Speaker 4:Can we just pivot for a second? So living in chronic pain can kind of make you feel like you're going bonkers, because it's not something that other people can see. So how has living with chronic pain influenced your mental health?
Speaker 3:You know it can kind of be a mind game. You know just kind of start to wonder if your needs are too much. If you know it's the isolation that can come with it, right, like, if you've got a migraine you're not going, that can come with it, right. Like if you've got a migraine you're not going to hang out with your friends. You know you can't go to work and isolation is definitely, you know where a lot of that. You've got to get trapped in your own head and start overthinking and all you can see is your pain or your isolation or, you know, fixate on things. Because you know if you're in this kind of negative, you know physical state, your brain's going to go there too, maybe not all the time, but more easily. Maybe we'll say that.
Speaker 3:So it can be difficult if you can't get up. I mean, I'm definitely somebody I can't just sit at home and do nothing and feel good about it generally Once in a while, cool, great. Yes, I love rest, but if I'm literally just stuck at home, I will totally start to spin out and just get in my head about stuff. Chronic pain can really take a toll and as it affects your relationships I've had to cancel so many plans with my friends or things that I've wanted to do because I just couldn't. And luckily I have really cultivated a really supportive group of friends, some of who do also deal with chronic pain and others who are just compassionate people and they understand and they know that I'm not canceling because I want to you know whatnot but definitely there's guilt that goes along with that and that guilt can feed into the struggles. So it's a multi-layered thing for sure into the struggles.
Speaker 4:So it's a it's a multi-layered thing, for sure it is multi-layered.
Speaker 4:I think that sometimes the heaviest part that we carry is the guilt of saying I can't and we were just talking about it last week, of the I can't but being able to say I can't for reasons that care for you so that you can later. But the guilt part, it's the silent echo that lives rent free in your mind but I just told so-and-so no. And what if they think this? Because I can't, or if I say no again this time, they'll stop inviting me places because they automatically assume that my answer is no. But then you carry guilt for saying yes when you know that you should have said no, and I think that's the misconception. People don't see that part that you carry guilt for saying yes, yes to showing up for someone that wasn't you, when you knew that you didn't feel well. What are some of your key coping mechanisms? How do you?
Speaker 3:talk yourself down. I have developed a good internal introspective tools in regards to that, namely just self-compassion. Right, I treat myself as if I would treat a girlfriend or anybody, or a patient. If I have a patient come in and they're crying because they can't go to work or whatever it is, I pat them on the shoulder and I'm going to say you are doing everything you can. I just very much mother myself. That really eases it. Um and and uh. Speaking to my inner child, to like the inner child who was told like you're not doing enough or you're you are too much, or all the, all the things that we, you know that we have deep-seated speaking to that, because it's that part of you that often is the part of you that is having those, those conflicted feelings. So I just just be very gentle with myself and when I can't, my partner does it for me. I'm very lucky, very, very lucky, to have a very supportive partner. So that's kind of what I lean on.
Speaker 4:So you talked a little bit when we talked to you about feeling dismissed in medical settings. What has that experience been like and how have you learned to advocate for yourself when you feel like you're not being heard in those spaces?
Speaker 3:Good question. So I I have been dismissed with the migraine piece. You know, to an extent I haven't sought an abundance of care from Western providers other than getting those muscle relaxers. At one point, because I work in the field that I do, I've really kind of leaned on that. So the migraines just kind of. They just kind of get like they're brought up and then disregarded.
Speaker 3:Where I felt the gaslighting piece much more is the women's health piece experience that I've had it's struggling with issues where walking in a lot of doctors are like I literally have never seen this before. I have no idea. Your only option is surgery, but I don't know who's going to do that for you because it's such a sensitive thing that you are probably just going to have to. You either have to like deal with some serious lifelong risks or just deal with the continuing to have this issue and that has been so painful. So I mean I stopped seeking care for years because I was like nobody can help me. You just end up feeling unhelpful, you just have to suffer and it's terrible. It's a terrible feeling.
Speaker 3:I finally finally have found a doctor who I. The first time I went and saw her she was like oh yeah, I saw. I've seen that before. I just dealt with that last week. We're cool, I got a plan for you, we're all good. And oh my God, I cannot tell you how amazing that was to feel. And this was only recently. This was within the last six months that I found this doctor. So the fact that it took me I mean, I've had this particular issue since probably 13, 14 years now and finally it took me that long to find somebody who knows what's up. So the dismissal is very painful. We'll just say that.
Speaker 2:And it feels so good when they get what we're talking about, even better when they struggle with the same thing and they can say you need to do this, this and this. I remember going to the emergency room one time because a migraine had gotten so bad and my husband was worried. They were like, oh yeah, we deal with this all the time. I've got the perfect cocktail for you and I was like, wow, okay, I think I'm in good hands. Yeah, and that's such a great feeling, because who wants to go ask for help and feel you're getting dismissed or ignored or blown off? No, you want the people that get it, that see you for who you are and have the exact advice, tips and what to do, even if it's not just medication, if it's other things too. Give me all the things. I want to know it all. What are you going to do to make me feel better? Please bring it all Right.
Speaker 3:I mean it's really is traumatizing, right? It was fully braced when I was going into this doctor's appointment, this most recent one. He finally gets it before I had met her. I was going into the appointment fully braced, to be told can't help you. Sorry, you know. And after I left I I I kept telling my boyfriend all day I was like I keep feeling like I'm having like brain glitches Cause like my brain didn't't, couldn't compute that somebody could actually help me, like had I just had to continuously shudder and just like let my body have that that very visceral reaction or somatic reaction, rather, because it was such a shock to the system and I was able to release that trauma that I had been carrying. You know, obviously I wasn't able to release 16 years or whatever it was of trauma in that moment, but it was just such a physical experience, the act of being seen and finding someone who can take care of you.
Speaker 2:Now, what do you wish? That providers understood better about migraines and chronic pain?
Speaker 3:There's just no one size fits all answer. I feel like in Western medicine they go headache to headache, a migraine to migraine In a lot of cases. In Chinese medicine it's not like that at all. It's all about patterns and, you know, we can kind of get to diagnoses based on specific symptoms that you're having, because not all migraines look or feel exactly the same.
Speaker 3:And so being able to differentiate a little bit in terms of how you treat and also being super mindful of how you're communicating with patients I've had patients come in my office and be like I had a doctor tell me you are in such bad health you could go to sleep and not wake up the next morning. So the patient didn't go to bed, didn't want to go to sleep for a week because she was so scared. These types of things. Being super mindful of the way you're wording things, because they have such an impact on the person who's hearing them, on the person who's coming to you for help I think that's the biggest thing, because chronic pain is chronic. It often doesn't go away, unfortunately. But care is as much the physical piece as it is the emotional piece. I think that gets lost a lot in the system.
Speaker 2:You've built an impressive self-care toolkit. Can you walk us through some of the things that help you the most?
Speaker 3:Man, I have so many things that I do. Anytime a migraine hits, you know, I grab the topical creams, the pain patches, the heating pad, ibuprofen. I do have a small stash of muscle relaxers that I just save for when I really really need them. What else do I do? I have a TENS unit. That's been huge. That has been really really helpful. Cannabis is really really helpful, particularly for the muscle pain and the nausea piece. What else?
Speaker 3:do I do Just stretching and gentle movement, going for a little walk, getting a little physical movement in, but not pressuring myself to go bust out a hard workout. That's too much in those moments, but just something. Being able and learning how to listen to your body, I think is such a huge piece Because, like you said before, when it's a new experience you don't understand what's happening or how to navigate it. Now, 15 years later, I'm still knocked over by it often enough, but I can expedite the experience and recover within a couple hours, whereas in the past it might have been a couple of days.
Speaker 2:With the TENS unit? Where do you place it? To help with something like that?
Speaker 3:My issues are very much. I have just persistent knots around my right shoulder blade, so I usually focus it around there. You got to be real careful with the tensing neck. If you put it too close to your neck in certain ways it can just pull your, you know, which is just. It kind of mimics the spasm of a migraine, so it can have the opposite effect. Um, when it kind of snaps your, your neck, you know together uh to your shoulder, but otherwise uh typically do it further down on the back, because even when I'm having the pain up in my neck and head, I know that the root of it is further down and so I can get those muscles to relax. Everything up the chain is relaxed.
Speaker 2:Okay, I've never even thought to try one for a migraine, so I've used it for everything else, uh-huh.
Speaker 3:I mean, it certainly depends on where your migraines are coming from, right, if it's not a musculos-based one, if it's more vasodilation, where you're getting too much blood to your head all of a sudden, it's not necessarily going to have the same effect, but if there's a muscle piece, it's super helpful. Worth a shot.
Speaker 2:With so many tools and strategies, how do you know when to lean into one versus rest and do less?
Speaker 3:I've developed a protocol. I know if I do the thing where I wake up with that neck pain, I got to do everything I can, I throw everything at it. Usually it doesn't culminate until I actually throw up and then I lay back down or I usually I sit, I prop myself up and sit with the heating pad with, with all the things that I can't, that I can. But then once I wake up from that nap, after that that's when I know it's rest time. If we take it easy today, don't push it prior to a migraine.
Speaker 3:If I feel one starting to come on, often I'll, you know, I'll feel the ache come on in the evening, but then the actual migraine doesn't come on until the mornings and in those cases I might be getting that tensing it out, I might be getting, you know, a Theracane out, doing some self-massage. You know, whatever it is, I very rarely have nothing going on here like in terms of I usually have a pain patch or something because it is so chronic. But knowing when to rest and knowing when to push it is definitely just. It's a matter of experience and learning how to reach your body and knowing, like you know, how your specific pain experience progresses once it begins.
Speaker 4:Can you tell us a little bit about the Audacious Patient? What inspired you to create it? What's the mission behind it? What's it all about? Absolutely.
Speaker 3:I started the audacious patient. Honestly, it came out of rage. It came out of seeing all of the injustices in the system, all of the cracks that people fall through, all of the debt that people become saddled with, and wanting better for people, for everyone as well as myself, you know. And making it accessible and making it almost fun, right, like this stuff is so boring, it's so overwhelming, it's daunting, it's gross, it's not sexy, and so if I can make it absorbable, digestible for people, because I just know for myself, I didn't know any of this stuff until I got into my 30s. I didn't have health insurance, I didn't go to the doctor, I didn't know how to find doctors, I didn't know anything. It's because it's so intentionally confusing and daunting. And now that I'm older and I've been on both sides of it for long enough now and seen so much not go right for people, I want to do what I can to help guide people to get the care that they need and deserve, because the system is so screwed up and we deserve better.
Speaker 4:I agree, I agree. I love that you have a voice and I love that that voice is roaring, that you want to change it for the community Because, seriously, it's kind of a lot of shenanigans going on. How does shifting away from hands-on patient care, how does that new chapter feel for you? So I'm a nurse by trade and I went more holistic once my chronic illness journey started to unfold. So I'm more on the holistic side, doing what would say it started with rage for me as well. I started to hit that gaslighting circle and I was like wait a minute, I'm a whole practitioner. I know that you're lying to me and so and I've sat in rooms while you lie to other patients, while I understood that real things were happening to them. What does that shift feel like for you? Is it scary and empowering, or not so much scary anymore? But you're like heck, yeah, let's do this because I'm a badass Like where are you in that transition?
Speaker 3:That's definitely got a mixed answer as well. You know, I would say it's both scary and empowering and, to use your words, more empowering than scary at this point. But definitely, kind of coming out of the treatment room and kind of belting this stuff out loud, there is an intimidation piece putting yourself out into the world. What if everybody thinks it's stupid or hates it or whatever, which I know that's not going to happen, right, there's just that little voice sometimes that you, you got to kind of contend with. So there is a bit of that, but for the most part I just feel so Ignited, right, like just so motivated to help ignite other people. Yeah, I don't want people to be specifically avoiding getting care because they don't know how, or they're scared or they're you know they can't afford it, or whatever getting care because they don't know how, or they're scared or they're you know they can't afford it, or whatever. And so it feels like I can. I'm very excited about the ability to reach and help more people than I can just with one-on-one patient care.
Speaker 1:It's powerful it gives you the tinglys in a good way Indeed so when you're not managing migraines or creating content, where do you find your joy?
Speaker 3:hazel stories are encouraged that is on my note. Hazel definitely is a big stress reliever for me. She's very cuddly, she's very kissy, she's silly. Even though she's 15, she still, like, runs up and down the stairs screaming opera songs, basically just meowing away, but she also snuggles up and sleeps and and and whatnot. Um, so she definitely can help kind of bring me back down to earth, calm me down and make me laugh like rest of the gamut, right, um, otherwise, you know I I love getting outside when I can and spending time with friends. Uh, like you said in the intro, like game nights and bonfires and beach days. I love floating in a lake and I also like the introverted, like reading my books, and you know I like a good balance of because I am, I would say, more on the introvert side of things. So I do definitely like my solo stuff, but I love my friends, I love the people in my life, so I love party games and art nights and all that.
Speaker 1:So that those are the things that fill your cup in between the bad days. So I have to know more about these theme parties you do, and how does that fill your cup? I gotta know more details on that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, I love a theme party. My friends and I do. We started doing them a lot during covid, where you know we just be like let's get in the yard and like have a little tiki thing or like, um, you know, whatever we, whatever little way, we could find joy and silliness in a very hard time, right, yeah, so now that life's picked back up again they're happening a little less frequently, but they still do, and it's kind of you know who's ever birthday it is, picks the theme or whatnot. We've done glow-in-the-dark parties. We've done country western themes. We've done, like I said, tiki parties. Which one was your favorite? I think that's a tough one. I would say the the glow-in-the-dark neon one was pretty fun. We had to art. My friend's whole backyard lit up with rope lights and and and strobe lights and party lights and black light like everything.
Speaker 1:So that would fill my cup too.
Speaker 3:I can see why you get your, your cup filled in. I was like I want to glow more than anyone else has ever glowed before, so people just loaded me all up. However, I did feel guilty the next day with all the trash that had accumulated, so I won't be doing that again. That's all one time, single use. So I didn't like that piece, but the night of it was very, very fun.
Speaker 4:What's your favorite game? Party game. I didn't like that piece, but the night of.
Speaker 3:It was very, very fun. What's your favorite game? Party game. You know, there's this very silly one, it doesn't, I don't know. There's probably a name for it, but it's basically, I call it a visual telephone. So you have, everybody has a stack of pages for as many people are in the circle, and on the first page everybody just writes like a phrase, and it can be anything, and the goal is you pass it to the next person and they will draw whatever you wrote, and then the next that person will pass it and they have to write what they think you just threw, and so on and so forth. So it comes back to you and it it just never ceases to just make you laugh till you cry. You love it everybody, and I already love it.
Speaker 4:It's so funny Because the things people would be drawing that they thought that I said.
Speaker 3:I already love it.
Speaker 2:It's hilarious. Have you ever been to or had a murder mystery party? I?
Speaker 3:haven't. I did get invited to one a couple years ago and I ended up having COVID so I wasn't able to go, but I have heard they're really fun. It feels a little intimidating to me, depending on how involved it is. Like if I have to be a whole character, that feels a little bit involved for me, but it depends on the people I'm with and how involved it is.
Speaker 2:Well, I can give you all the details. My sister-in-law loves to do themed parties as well. She even did like a whole survivor themed party in her backyard one time, but then it progressed into murder mysteries. I've attended a few there, so I tend to do I'm crazy, so I do the very involved characters. I was a waitress one time. I had to walk around and make sure everybody had their drinks, but I also had to be very nosy and ask a lot of weird questions. And then we had one where this was probably my favorite. It was trailer park tragedy, and so the trashier the better, we all had to dress just as trashy as we could and I got the lovely part of dying. So that was super fun and tragic, uh-huh, yeah. So I definitely that's fun to try it. You can actually there's a website and you can decide. You know how many people you're going to have, how big the group is, and then each person can say like how involved they want to be cool okay, so, so it's flexible.
Speaker 3:Okay, I like that. It's very flexible, which is great. Look into that, yeah. Yeah, I want to do an 80s one.
Speaker 2:Oh, that sounds fun Okay anyway, what advice would you give to someone newly diagnosed and feeling overwhelmed by chronic pain?
Speaker 3:I guess, I would tell them that they don't have to know everything right now and it's okay to be gentle with yourself and don't push yourself too hard. I feel we're just so trapped in this culture of productivity is king and if you're not busy, then you're worthy of whatever, and that's just not the case. It's okay if you don't feel good and you need to rest. I think mostly I would just speak to compassion regarding those cases self-compassion.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. And for those fellow practitioners who also struggle with chronic illness, what message would you like to share with them?
Speaker 3:But also you need to have self-compassion and you are human and it's. It's okay if you also just can't make it in one day or if you're just not on all cylinders and maybe you save your patient notes for the next day because you just can't Do what you can, and trust that when you feel better you'll be able to do more. Just patience, patience with yourself.
Speaker 4:The reminders that the importance of being extremely gentle with yourself. The world is rough enough. They're just they're beating us up. You know doctors were giving us the business and not always actively listening, and so I love that, the gentle reminders to be gentle with yourself and patient while you're being gentle. I can't believe that we chatted your ear off and we haven't asked you yet. How can our listeners connect with you and support?
Speaker 3:your work with the audacious patient.
Speaker 3:Yeah, certainly, finding me on Instagram at the audacious patient is a way to keep up with me on a daily, weekly basis. Otherwise, my website has everything theaudaciouspatientcom. I've got a small library of freebie resources. You need scripts for how to negotiate a medical bill or advocating with doctors or creating a health history template, so it's easier when you do go into a new practitioner for the first time different sorts of things. I also have a small shop with some low cost resources as well digital downloads, but those are TikTok. I'm also on TikTok, but, yeah, social media and my website are the best places.
Speaker 4:And finally, what does being a spony sister mean to you?
Speaker 3:It means that you, you understand, you understand each other. You are able to hold quiet space or people who suffer the same thing as you, or their, their own version of of chronic pain or illness, like then, if it's different than yours, um, so I guess it's, it's a solidarity and just a quiet knowing right, like every. This world is so loud and we, we just don't have to be loud, but we just have to be there for each other.
Speaker 4:I love that.
Speaker 3:That was so peaceful yeah. I really like to balance the my, my, my audacious patient brand is very kind of loud and kind of in your face and whatnot. I kind of jokingly call myself like the sacred punk auntie. I have this loud, rage filled kind of voice, but it also is backed up by a lot of compassion and embodiedness and empathy.
Speaker 4:It's balance.
Speaker 3:I like to, I like to, yeah, lead with both of those things.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I love it. I'm here for the balance.
Speaker 2:Well, thank you so much for joining us today. Absolutely Thank you for having me Right. Well, until next time, don't forget your spoon.
